Hi, Her Majesty Ms Bona Petite here, wishing all her royal subjects good eating and a sweet life.

Lamas gathering was a delicious event with delectable men everywhere. This year Madame Maqui had a simply fabulous idea for the Lamas meal. A ritual in itself. Allow me to pontificate on this magic night.

First a number of gallant knights spent days putting up a tent made from a parachute I purchased in San Francisco. Now, when I purchased this thing I was under the royal impression that it was very big(sound familiar?). We were awaiting the opening of a giant parachute that 70 people could sit or lay under. After a circle was cast by the Supreme Sorceress herself, Raif, the big moment had arrived. I am holding the case, a long fat tubular construction, and Sir Knight Eden grabs the long fate tube and runs - pop - out comes the parachute. The nylon cords are caught in my royal hand, fire rips though my palm as the nylon cords burn, blister and sizzle my delicate fingers. The wind catches the parachute and the cutest little white hat opens. I mean, my dear, it may go with my white evening gown, but it certainly won't cover 70 people. Those shining knights came to the rescue of their queen and created a festive colorful arena for the sensual food event of a life time.

The loyal subjects, after a day of ritual and installation of a new Prosperity Altar, congregated in the festive tent in which carpet was laid out and flowing fabric everywhere. Two lovely damsels went from foot to foot, washing and massaging everyone's feet.

[Clap - Clap] "Let the feast begin."

Now, I have to tell you that there were no utensils and no plates available. The courses were served by gaily attired servant to each small group of scantily and outrageously outfitted guests. "No, no dear don't touch the food. Let me feed you" was the slogan of the day. We fed each other all the courses.

The first course was served in royally cut watermelons filled with juicy, tangy, wet, succulent pieces of fruit adorned with delicate edible flowers.

[Snap - Snap] The next course was led out by her Royal Highness, Princess Cory draped in a 30s style turban and a black and white checkered gown wrapped around her exquisite body. This was stuffed, piping hot mushrooms served on a platter of large kale and chard leaves. The guests were moaning as these hot juicy morsels were popped into their mouths by their writhing companions.

"I want to be the plate." What did my ears hear? I look over and there is Ms. Balance lying prone on her back with 5 or 6 very hunky men surrounding him on all sides. "Oh my, is that a morsel of food those men are licking and chewing on? Oh my, what are they doing now." Never you mind dear. I don't think I'll go there, but certainly several of those studs did. Poor, poor Balance(the lucky girl).

The course continue: toasted crudités and chips with freshly made hummus in three delirious flavors. For the musky ones, wild mushrooms, for the savory ones, garlic and black olives and tangy lemon for the tart(s).

Several members of the greater community here in paradise arrived. Including Flora, so aptly named for her spirit is like a fresh bouquet of flowers, graced our feast. She still talks about it when we see her at the local farmers market.

Oh, back to the feast. The antipasto with fresh marinated garden vegetables, heart of artichoke, stuffed grape leave(dolmas) rolled right in her majesty's kitchen. "Is that tomatoes on your nipples, olives in your belly button, and, oh my, is that a cucumber or . . . Oh dear those boys are really getting into the swing of it."

Now came hot stuffed empanades, savory and served on bitter herbs of arugula, endive and other fresh garden delicacies. The tent was in a murmur, almost a whispering excitement. Warm towels were passed around. Paper lanterns were lit(one of them managed to catch fire, you should have seen this queen move). A hush of excitement exists. Hearts are aflame with appreciation for each other. We were learning to be open, to trust. We were allowing someone to feed our need, of being receptive. Not just giving but rather giving by allowing others to give to us. Oh thank you Maqui, what a delightful gift.

Oh, did I mention that Steven played and sang to the kitchen crew for half the day. It was like having a five changer CD that just kept picking the perfect music that kept of going. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

And now the moment that lifted the tent right off the ground. Dates(I'm sure a few where made that night) individually stuffed with a sweet, slightly nutty cream. When these morsels were placed in the moist receptive mouths and everyone bit down on the tough, succulent date, the creamy, sweet goo erupted. The whole body of guests let forth a simultaneous orgasmic moan.

We're not done yet dear. Princess Cory spent the hot afternoon, slaving like a servant girl, preparing individual tarts(like the tart she is) with fresh strawberries laced in a not too sweet, oh just right, apple and strawberry jam mastered by Madame Maqui. Served while bards and minstrels sang praises to the Goddess. You could hear Pan rejoicing.

Grateful and touching thank-yous filled the air. Someone said "This is just like doing an ecstasy trip. Wow, what a natural high." Our hearts and communication chakras were wide open.

Oh, did I mention that the prayers and ritual of the day were in loving rain. When the feast was over the grey and black clouds that had been hovering in the west, suddenly and fiercly, blew in and pelted rain for five minutes, acknowledging their gratitude and love of the spirits who had been invited, and then blew the parachute right off the center pole, bringing completion to the royal feast.

OK dears, let me give you the recipe for these royal, stuffed dates in hopes that you can experience this orgasmic moment:

Gather

1 LB fresh dates(pitless)

8 oz(1 pkg.) cream cheese softened

1/2 cup toasted walnuts(10 - 20 minutes at 350o)

1/2 tsp. vanilla extract

1 Tbs. sugar(optional)

Cream together cream cheese, vanilla, and sugar. Add finely chopped walnuts. Split dates on one side and proceed to stuff. Refrigerate until firm (always preferable, won't you say darling). Stuff gently and teasingly into your lovers(that plural not possessive, dear) mouth.

Enjoy my loyal ones

Ms Bona Petite